Me: Yay alcohol!
Brain: Yay alcohol!
Brain: ok you talked me into it
Brain: Still no.
Brain, 4.07am: ok
Brain, 8.34am: haha jk
Me: r u serious or is this a trap?
Me: … okay. That sounds fake, but okay.
CAR ALARM, 2.46am: WEEOOWEEOOWEEOO
Brain: OK, since I ws thwarted yesterday by that fucking car alarm. Can we key the car next time?
Me: Yes, if you let me sleep until it inetivably goes off again.
Brain: Deal. SLEEPY TIME.
Brain, 3am-8am: i mean yeah i said u could sleep, i didnt say i wasnt going to give you CONSTANT ANXIETY NIGHTMARES HAHA
Me: I really hate you right now
Me: NOT TODAY, SATAN
Me: ok for reals this time i have to coach roller derby tomorrow, truce?
Brain: Here’s your truce: You go to bed and I will let you KIND OF sleep all night. But I will also wake you up every time there is the slightest noise outside.
Me: … Like what?
Brain: Well it’s Saturday night, so how about every time a drunk person speaks anywhere on your very long street?
Brain: And whenever a car goes past!
Me: But the taxis for most of the city go down my road at night
Brain: Yes, see, now you’re getting it!
Me: I suppose this way I at least get to sleep a bit?
Brain: That’s the spirit!
Brain: … You’re wrong, but that’s the spirit!
Me: *sleeps for 18 hours*
Me: SUCK IT, BITCH, I WIN